Orphan Black Recap: Rehab, Runaways, and the Best Hug Ever

Season 2 just keeps proving that the worse the clones' lives get, the better Orphan Black becomes. We pick up right after Sarah and Daniel's car crash from last week, and the only good news is Sarah isn't as dead as Daniel seems to be. She crawls out of the wreckage with the help of the miraculously timed Cal. While Cal believes they should call the police, Sarah hasn't explained that's kind of a "no can do" for Official Clone Business. Instead Sarah convinces him to help hide the accident. Poor Cal concedes, since apparently his only purpose in this show is to be cute and do whatever Sarah tells him. 

Over at Prolethian Farmville, Helena's pretty sure something's been done to her, and Henrick's daughter Grace is not all about her new Ukranian step-mom. So not about Helena in fact, that when she goes to check on her she also tries to smother her to death. Oh Grace, don't you know Helena can't die? But you certainly can, and Helena tries by strangling Grace then running away. She makes a pit stop in a creepy makeshift medical center, where she's overwhelmed with memories of a clearly non-consensual artificial insemination process. Now it's definitely time for Helena to bolt, and she does so past a very confused Detective Bell, who then does his best to stop the Prolethians from chasing her. Safe to say that wedding dress has definitely seen better days. Safe to also say Helena has never seen a good day in her life. 

Next on the "No Good, Very Bad Day" list is Alison, who wakes up in at first what she thinks is a Dyad facility but turns out to be rather normal rehab without any memory of being put there. At least this is kind of a good-bad thing, since even her BFF Felix can't argue she does seem to have a problem with just about every substance (not to mention totally ruined our chances at ever seeing Blood Ties in its completion). In rehab, Alison must succumb to daily drug tests and, even worse, a visit from Donnie where he tells her that if she doesn't finish the program, he and his lawyer will make sure she doesn't see her children.  

Because Cal apparently has literally nothing to do with his life than facilitate the illegal adventures of a woman who once robbed him and never told him about his daughter, he has set up a camper for them to escape in. Talk about dedication. Sarah eventually tells him the basics — a corporation is after her — but nothing about being a clone. She does use Daniel's cell phone to text Rachel as Daniel and pretend everything's under control.

Cosima's continued depressing study of recently deceased clone Jennifer is interrupted by a Skype date with Sarah. She catches Cosima up on the whole Daniel kidnapping thing, and then shows Cosima the picture of Project Leda. Cosima catches Sarah up on the mytholody of Leda and the Swan, which is the story of how Zeus came from Mt. Olympus in the guise of a swan and impregnanted a human queen, Leda. The two had twins who were half-human, half-god. Sounds pretty clone-like/neolutionist, if you ask me! Unfortunately, the answer-packed(ish) scene ends in Cosima hacking up some clone-disease phlegm. Get better, girl! 

Mrs. S is back, and she's sexier then ever. But first, she shows up to ask Benjamin, the man who once "kidnapped" Sarah, for new papers because she has to go to London to find someone. No need to travel, insists Benjamin: "Carton's here." Magically, we don't even have to wait an episode to meet the mysterious Carlton. After a near-violent introduction, it turns out he and Mrs. S have a much more tender relationship. Not the romance we were expecting tonight! After the hook up, they have a vague heart-to-heart about how Carlton brought Sarah to Mrs. S' door 20 years ago. Not much more is discernable to our un-Leda-understanding ears, but there's sure to be more on that soon.

Oh Cal, you really have no boundaries do you? Sarah tells him she has to go on a brief mission back home, and he totally accepts taking care of Kira for the night. While snooping, Sarah runs into none other than Felix. Together, they search for any information they can and end up unearthering dirt on Carlton, a "human smuggler" who got 15 years for hiding people. They also find out about a lab explosion where a research project was being conducted by Susan and Ethan Duncan — potentially Rachel's parents. They're pretty sure those are the same people in the Project Leda photo, and that Mrs. S must have known about this the entire time. 

On the way home, Sarah decides to stop at Rachel's apartment. She breaks in to investigate while chatting with Cosima and Felix on the phone about the background of Susan and Ethan Duncan. Apparently, they had a top secret project going on (Rachel/Clones), and Sarah was actually supposed to be their child instead. As they talk, Sarah watches a childhood video of Rachel playing with her parents. It's all very cute and friendly, despite Cosima describing how, from what she's researched, Rachel would probably have been raised self-aware and without any emotional attachements. The undercover break-in party is interrupted when the apparently the not-dead Daniel enters, furious and covered in blood. Sarah tries to escape, but she's not fast enough and Daniel catches and ties her up in the bathroom. 

Sarah's not usually the brightest of the clones, but she has figured out that Daniel is Rachel's monitor. She tries to get him to let her go with a few different tactics — spitting in his face, trying to get him to think of her as Rachel — but the best tactic is easily Helena in all her bloody wedding dress and shrieking violins glory bursting in and killing Daniel. Now as far as Sarah was previously aware, Helena has risen from the dead after she shot her, so it's understandable that Sarah's pretty freaked out. Luckily, Helena's willing to forgive, and even hug it out! Helena saved Sarah's life, and now she wants Sarah's help with what it is that the Prolethians have done to her. Seestras unite!

Before the episode ends we take one last trip to Prolethian Farmvilles (Grace is still alive, by the way, in case anyone cared), where the gang isn't too torn up about Helena's disappearence because they've got a new arrival of their own. Just what the world needed, another little Helena. Until next week!