Just because you're on the bottom doesn't mean you're not in control.
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Being a power bottom has its perks. I mean, getting to receive while leading the rhythm? Please. Who doesn't love that?
Of course, that doesn't necessarily mean the power bottoms have it easy. In fact, they've got plenty of problems to deal with. There's dealing with fussy tops, having to have a stricter diet, and needing to keep up appearances... just to name a few.
Here are 15 problems every power bottom can relate to.
1. Learning the basics
Everyone has to be a baby top or bottom one way or another. Same with being a power bottom, too. You gotta learn from scratch how to lead while receiving, and there's nothing wrong with that. But it's still something you gotta work through over time, especially if you're not used to being on the bottom.
2. Fighting off horny tops
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Yes, everyone is out there looking -- but just because power bottoms like to perform doesn't mean they don't have their standards. There's always a time and a place to have sex, whether with one partner or many, but fending off the pack is something every power bottom goes through.
3. Having a reputation
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Having a reputation can be a good thing, or it can be a bad thing. A lot of that has to deal with you and how you handle things, but every power bottom who has a specialty in something knows exactly the kind of reputation they have.
4. Assuming you're submissive
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Just because you like to take on the bottom role doesn’t automatically mean you’re the submissive one. Along with stigma, power bottoms oftentimes deal with problems of being forced into submission when they want to be the ones in control.
5. Who brings what?
It's usually obvious who brings the lube, condoms, and toys if you're on the top or bottom. But when you're a power bottom, that line can get murky. It's not uncommon to be a little confused about who should be responsible for certain things, so make sure to communicate clearly with your playmate.
6. Keeping it clean!
If you're a top converting to the power bottom ways, this one might be a little daunting. Yes, you gotta remember to keep yourself clean. No need to go overboard, just make sure you wash up nicely and do any prep you need to do.
7. Watching what you eat
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The digestive system is a real thing, and timing is everything when it comes to being on the bottom. From making sure you fit into a “window” of accessible time to bottom to keeping up with your fiber, the bottom diet is one of the most common grievances.
8. Pressure to perform
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It’s bad enough as it is that you’re always expected to be cleaned and presentable, but when you factor in the competition, it makes the pressure to perform that much worse.
9. Your playmate assumes the backdoor is open for business
Maybe it's just not your thing. Or maybe you're having a rough day down there and you don't want to receive. A good partner or playmate will respect your boundaries and honor that. But even dealing with the assumption really sucks ass.
10. Directing him or her to the right spot
No wait, just a little more to the left. Wait, no, your other left. Too far. Not far enough. OK, stop there. Good. Finally. Phew.
11. Going too fast
Woah, honey, it's not a race! Slow down over there.
13. It's still a lot of work
Laying down as a power bottom means you can relax a little bit more than you would propping yourself up as a top. But there's still a ton of work involved, especially if you're taking a hands-on approach with your partner.
14. Being told you're really just a top
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No, power bottoms play a very specific type of role: They receive on the bottom while leading or controlling the flow of play. There are so many different dynamics involved. Even if, you know, sometimes it's fun to switch up roles.
15. The stigma
For the stupidest reasons, stigma happens all the time (like when it happened to Emma Stone's Olive character in Easy A), and power bottoms get stigmatized for being on the bottom. It's not fair for a lot of reasons, because no one should be shamed for what role they play and what they enjoy during sex, but it's especially unfair for power bottoms, because there's so much work involved to take control on the bottom.
Adult stars Tony Genius, Jordan Starr, and Dom King.Mile High Entertainment / Carlos Salazar / Men.com
