Top 5 times Stormy Daniels DESTROYED Trump during her testimony and made us CACKLE

She caused quite a storm!

TV personality and former adult enertainment mogul Stormy Daniels finished her second day of testimony in the history-making trial against former President Donald Trump, and her responses to being cross-examined have left the defense team flailing and us cackling!

Trump is currently in the middle of what is colloquially being called the hush-money trial because he is facing 34 criminal charges for falsifying business records in an attempt to hide payoffs to women he had allegedly had affairs with in a bid to keep the news from the American public in the lead up to the 2016 presidential election.

Daniels has spent two days testifying in the trial because the prosecution is trying to prove that through his former lawyer, Michael Cohen, Trump paid Daniels $130,000 to keep quiet about the short affair the two had in 2006 — Trump allegedly falsified business records by reimbursing Cohen and logging them as legal expenses through the Trump Organization.

While the defense may have hoped that Daniels would have been cowed by their frequently rude and demeaning questions, they obviously didn't realize just how quick-witted and delightfully snarky Daniels is — she once said that the only people who use her legal name "are my mother and the IRS and I hate them both."

Her ability to throw zingers and barbs at Trump in her answers to questions while sitting on the witness stand at the first-ever trial of a former U.S. president is remarkable. The American people should be indebted to Daniels for sharing so many embarrassing details about Trump. It was truly an act of public service.

So let's take a look at Stormy Daniels' five best (and most hilarious) responses to being questioned by the defense!

Orange turd

I’m fucking crying 😂#StormyDaniels pic.twitter.com/cEVxWVUZFW

— guesswhatchickenbutt (@Heather_P_NYC) May 9, 2024

On Daniels’ second day of testimony, she didn’t hold back!

Trump’s defense team spent the day trying to make the jury believe that Daniels’ is a lying porn star who is only out for money. Trump attorney Susan Necheles even read out a past tweet where Daniels wrote that she doesn’t “owe him shit and I’ll never give that orange turd a dime,” Rolling Stone reports.

But instead of catching her off guard, Daniels shot back with a zinger we won’t soon forget. “It doesn’t say ‘President Trump,’ it says ‘orange turd,’” Daniels responded. “If that’s how you’re going to interpret it, that’s on you.” Then she clarified and said, "Oh, I absolutely meant Mr. Trump."

Terrible sex

@TeamTrump
Noah Berlatsky on Stormy Daniels:

There’s your big He-Man, MAGA: A guy who has to lie, make promises and finally blocks the door before a woman will go to bed with him. She stares at the ceiling; tries to think about something else. And leaves in a state of shock. pic.twitter.com/9PdRbxhywY

— ClaudiaMontagueRidesAgain! (@MsMegara) May 8, 2024

When Daniels recounted her first sexual experience with Trump, she said that she just stared at the ceiling and was “trying to think about anything other than what was happening there," the Washington Post reported. Considering how much Trump relies on his reputation as a virile Lothario with his MAGA base, it must have infuriated him to have people learn that not only does he lack…stamina…but he’s also so bad in bed that Daniels had to lie back and think of England to get through it. We love her for sharing that tidbit with the world.

Who wants to admit they had sex with Trump?

Stormy Daniels to Trump's attorney: "Nobody would ever want to publicly say that they had sex with Trump."

She got you there, Susan!#TrumpTrial pic.twitter.com/BvfhATzlGv

— TrumpsTaxes (@TrumpsTaxes) May 9, 2024

Every time Trump’s defense team tried to make Daniels seem like a money-grubbing sex worker, she managed to turn things around to make Trump look bad — which made our day.

One of the best exchanges happened when Necheles said, “Even though you had agreed that you would not discuss this supposed story and you had received a lot of money for that agreement, you then decided that you wanted to publicly say that you had sex with Donald Trump,” CNBC reports.

Daniels’ response was priceless, “Nobody would ever want to publicly say that.”

She’s right. Who would want to add Trump to your sex scorecard? *Shudders*

Stranger than fiction

Necheles: "You have a lot of experience making phony stories about sex."
Daniels: "The sex in the films is very much real, just like what happened to me in that room. If that story was untrue, I would’ve written it to be a lot better.”
Stormy for the win.#DemsUnited #DemVoice1 pic.twitter.com/2MtOzfopvE

— Lisa Ericsson Murphy 🌊🌊GQP In Disarray (@lisakrstin) May 9, 2024

During cross examination, in an attempt to make Daniels seem like a liar, Necheles said, “You have a lot of experience making phony stories about sex," according to CNBC.

But Daniels wasn’t going to let her get away with that. “Wow. That’s not how I would put it,” she shot back. “The sex in the films is very much real, just like what happened to me in that room.”

Then Daniels quipped that if we was making up her experiences with Trump she “would’ve written it to be a lot better.”

Or better yet, written him out of the story all together!

Trump is a one pump chump

So, turns out Trump really is an American patriot. Because Stormy Daniels said he was a minute man.

— Lakota Man (@LakotaMan1) May 9, 2024

On her first day of testimony, Daniels had to recount her first sexual encounter with Trump, which took place in his hotel room. She described sex with the former president as “brief.” Who knew you could cut down a former leader of the free world so successfully with just one word? Stormy Daniels clearly did.

The Associated Press reports that Daniels has previously called the encounter “the worst 90 seconds of my life.”

Also, while this information is wildly embarrassing for Trump — who is desperate for everyone to believe he’s still a young, virile man — if you have to have sex with him, at least it is mercifully short.