8 Lessons About Love I've Learned From My Dog

8 Lessons About Love I've Learned From My Dog

Over the years I’ve had my own dogs, and every partner I’ve lived with has had a dog too. (There’s something about gay men and small dogs, and lesbians with huge dogs!) And loving dogs and living with them have taught me a thing or two about same-sex dating.

So here are 8 lessons about love and dating I’ve learned from living with dogs!

1. When your partner comes home, greet them at the door

I loved coming home after a hard day’s work to have an excited fella meet me at the door. (Butters always used to do just that!) Now I’m the person who stays at home all day working, so when my past partners come home, I’ve made it a point of stepping away from my computer to greet them. (Instead of doing what I used to do, which is say, “Sorry, hold up, five minutes, I’m finishing up something.”)

2. Sometimes your partner doesn’t need to hear anything; he just wants you to hold and pet him

He doesn’t want to hear what he could have done better or that there’s a lesson to be learned. He definitely doesn’t want you to tell him, “I told you so.” He just needs you to hold him tightly and pet him lightly. Let him know you’re there for him no matter what.  

3. Don’t try to do anything with your partner when he’s hungry

“Hangry” is a real thing. Dogs get it. Girlfriends get it. Boyfriends get it. Everyone gets it. Just like dogs, if you partner hasn’t been fed, don’t try to get him to do anything important.

4. When you’re stressed, go for a walk

You can go for a walk by yourself or with your partner. (Better yet, go with your dog!) But removing yourself from conflict, changing spaces, and exercising a little is sometimes all it takes to help change your mood.

5. You shouldn’t let him get you jealous

I’m a writer who works from home, so when I lived with my ex’s dog, his dog became very fond of me. It makes complete sense. I’m the one who would walk him during the day, feed him at night, and snuggle up with him every 45 seconds. Eventually, I become the dog’s favorite, and at first, my boyfriend got jealous. Of course he understood why that’s the case, but it taught both him (and me) that you can’t get jealous when your dog (or partner) starts to focus or like other people too. That doesn’t mean they love you any less. 

6. Reward good behavior

When your dog makes a doody outside, he gets a treat. When he doesn’t bark at the mailman, he gets a treat. For literally any positive behavior, you give that good boy a biscuit. While your partner hopefully shouldn’t need as much positive reinforcement, it is a fabulous idea to reward good behavior. I’m not saying blow him every time he takes out the trash...but I think both you and he can think of little ways to reward one another when you do something right.

7. Let him know when he’s being too much

All my little guys (dogs, not men) walk away when they’re over me. This usually happens when I’m being too overbearing with my love and demanding they do cute things for Instagram. I don’t feel hurt or rejected when they scurry away. I simply recognize I was being too much. Similarly, you should not be afraid to take a break from your man, (head to the other room and jerk off for all I care) when he’s being extra.

8. Love him unconditionally

Life is about love, and no one knows how to love better than man’s best friend. Be like your dog. Love your partner. Be loyal, kind, and open your big ol’ heart to him.