Kelly Marie Tran says all of her roles are queer — including her latest in 'Control Freak'

The film blends psychological and shocking body horror for an experience that’s equal parts rattling and relatable. On the surface level, it’s a surprisingly gruesome tale of possession, but dig a little deeper and there are rich layers of thematic depth exploring generational trauma, the crushing pressure of perfection, and the dangers of avoidance. It’s a potent and heady mix of ideas executed through the lens of a horror film — and one that Tran says queer audiences will find plenty to relate to.

PRIDE: I want to start with your character Val. I find her so relatable, not because of her perfection, although there are definitely things about her I found incredibly aspirational, but the vulnerability that kind of undergirds everything that she’s doing. What about her made you really want to take on the role?

KELLY MARIE TRAN: There’s this sort of fear of vulnerability and this idea that she cannot be honest with even her husband and the people in her life that care about her, because she feels as if she needs to present this image of a person. She needs to be strong, she needs to always be in control. She needs to be a person that has it all together, and that turns out very badly for her. But I think that’s a very relatable desire or fear to feel that, if you’re honest with people, that they won’t love you, or that something terrible will happen. And it sort of continues to spiral. But for me, I think that was very initially something that stood out as something I felt that a lot of people, and I think a lot of women, can relate to, this idea that we need to feel like we look a certain way. We’re skinny, but not too skinny. We’re pretty, but not too pretty. We’re smart, but we’re not going to challenge you. We have all these rules — that’s like the Barbie monolog lol — but that’s to say it does a really good job of conveying all the pressures that a woman might have in society. And I think Val very much is someone who feels that pressure daily.

Absolutely. I’m wondering then, for people who watch the film and may also see themselves in Val, is there anything that you hope that they walk away with from her journey?

It’s a scary thing to look at ourselves, really look at ourselves. And I think that’s something that I have started to do over the last maybe five to 10 years of my life, because I started recognizing these sort of subconscious narratives that I was living by that were not necessarily true, and it was really hindering who I thought I could be and the things I thought I could do. Anytime you are able to get into that raw, vulnerable place, maybe in a therapy setting, or in a group therapy setting, or in a counseling setting where you have support, it’s so hard and so scary, but I feel like for me, it really helped me become the person I am, and it made my life better, even though when I was doing it I hated it. Val shares that — for so much of that film, she doesn’t want to address things and she’s so avoidant. I don’t think she’s even conscious of how she’s pushing away her husband, but she’s definitely pushing him away.

You’ve touched on this a little bit, but is this something where you felt you could draw on personal experience to craft that part of your character?

I come from a very working class family — none of my family’s in entertainment — and then suddenly I was sort of in this world and kind of a public figure, and not understanding what that meant versus who I actually was. And I think that that’s something Val is also dealing with. She has this, like, public facing part of herself. So, I think there’s a lot of things that I drew from in my personal life. And I think I know people like Val, who on the outside are very successful and on the inside don’t know how to love themselves. It’s really hard to be around those types of people because they don’t want to look at themselves. Val does this too. She’s more willing to blame other people than look at herself, and it’s a really sad way to live life. It’s very Voldemort.

This is not textually a queer film, but I do feel queer folks can relate with Val’s struggle. There’s something analogous between her avoidance and what some LGBTQ+ individuals face when coming to terms with their identity. And her avoidance is how some queer folks can’t share their truth with the people they are closest to.

That’s definitely something I relate to in my own life. If I’m a queer person, Val’s a queer person so...

I will speak for myself, and then I’ll maybe speak from the lens of Val, but I think that it’s such a nuanced experience, and everyone’s coming out experience is so different. I will say Val’s instinct to avoid, an instinct to hide, an instinct to project an image, as opposed to really recognizing that her own happiness is more important than what other people think about her are things that I’ve had to deal with in my life. What Val has to reckon with throughout the whole movie is, ‘Am I going to keep faking it, or am I finally going to recognize the parts of myself that I need to not only acknowledge but deal with and embrace?’ I don’t want to spoil the film for people, but I think that’s very analogous to a coming out experience. There’s so much shame in Val and there’s so much shame projected by society onto queer people about acknowledging and embracing that part of your identity.

Let’s talk about that intense and gruesome final act. You go to such dark places with the performance in that moment, both mentally and physically. Talk to me about how you go to those places.

Maybe this is sharing too much of myself, but I’m like, I think that darkness is already...I’ve got a wealth of darkness in here that I’m just really pulling from. The human experience is so limitless. And, you know, there’s a lot of things happening in the world that, unfortunately, it’s pretty easy to think about sad things and get into that place. I hate that. So the physicality was one thing, and the emotionality was another thing. What an experience. I had a lot to pull from, and I also had an incredible environment of creatives who were so open to making that environment comfortable for me to go there. So yeah, props to the crew who are the reason I’m alive.

Control Freak is now streaming on Hulu. Watch the trailer below.