10 Reasons Your Next Boyfriend Should Be A Vegetarian

The World Health Organization just came out with a study published in The Lancet that has confirmed the worst for carnivores: processed meats cause certain cancers, especially colorectal. Your favorite red meats like hot dogs, sausages, and bacon are three of the main culprits wreaking cancerous havoc on your body.

It looks like vegetarians have officially won this battle. (Sorry meat eaters.) While I know us queer men love a good sausage, it looks like it’s time to start substituting our sausages for eggplants...

Now in honor of the vegetarians, who, yes, fine, you can say it, were right all along, here are 10 reasons your next boyfriend should be a vegetarian.

1. They have a decreased risk of acquiring cancer 


Are you happy now? It’s official. You were RIGHT.

2. They have a sound moral compass 
Environmentalist, lover of animals, political activist – we can definitely learn a thing or two from vegetarians.

3. They have elevated moods 
And there’s nothing wrong with a happy boyfriend.

4. They value their personal health and wellbeing 
It’s crucial to date a guy who knows how to take care of himself.

5. They know how to take a joke 
From all the nonstop teasing they get from being vegetarians.

6. They’ll force you to eat better 
And help you put down the hot dog. Nothing stops a behavior like a good old-fashioned nag from your partner.

7. Apparently, they have better sex lives too 
Not too shabby.

8. They’re cheap dates 
The meat dish is always more expensive than the vegetarian option. Feel free to have as much Caesar salad as you want. It’s on me.

9. They’re not afraid of commitment
I mean, if they can commit to a life without hamburgers, steaks, and sausages, they can definitely commit to a live with you. They are not deterred by things (like relationships) just because they're difficult. 

10. They stand up for what they believe in 
Whether they like it or not, being a vegetarian is a political statement and the sheer act of being one is counterculture to the rest of society (at least in the US).