This month commemorates the 25th anniversary of the release of The Mummy. The film, starring Brendan Fraser and Rachel Weisz, is often credited as being a bisexual awakening for many who saw it in their formative years. To celebrate The Mummy’s legacy, we’d like to highlight some other films that stand alongside it in what we are call the Bi-terion Collection. But first, how does one even begin deciding on films to be included the Bi-terion Collection (which is not by any means a comprehensive or complete list of very bisexual cinema)?
When working on a new piece, my first go to is always to think out loud with my partners.I am a gay man, my wife is a dyke, and my boyfriend is, with love, um, not very pop culture savvy, shall we say.
So finding very little help at home, I went back to the drawing board. I messaged my group chat of closest friends at 8 AM and said, “Can I poll the bisexuals in the audience?” and they all answered the call. Through a lot of back and forth with this focus group, and much studying of bisexual opinion on the internet, there was a lot of variety, but also some clear staples. Without further ado we submit our collection:
Pirates of the Caribbean (2003)
This was the #1 response I received about bi awakening movies, no contest. Full transparency, I had not seen Pirates of the Caribbean until earlier this year, but I was familiar with its reputation for causing bi panic. I get it now! Orlando Bloom is at his Orlando Bloomiest. Kiera Knightley is a hot pirate. That’s all you need!
Scooby-Doo (2002)
Scooby-Doo, on the other hand, I have seen a few times. Probably 1-3 times a day every day for my little sister’s entire third year on Earth. So definitely a few times. Freddie Prinze Jr. has already been noted for inspiring some gay awakenings, but in terms of an ensemble cast for bi inklings, you couldn’t do much better than this one. And if the soundtrack can add to the bisexual factor of a film, this definitely does.
Titanic (1997)
Kate Winslet and little baby butch Leo DiCaprio. Next question.
Sky High (2005)
The MCU wants what Sky High has. This was my first introduction to Mary Elizabeth Winstead and I never looked back. Maybe one day we’ll get a sequel with the Will Stronghold/Laila Williams/Warren Peace throuple plotline we deserve. Also, it’s been almost 20 years and “Warren Peace” is still an excellent name in my book.
Scream (1996)
When I asked if Scream should be in the Bi-terion Collection, my focus group me told that Scream had “reset their brain chemistry,” “don’t even get me STARTED,” and “Scream not only made me bi, but irredeemably horny.” I don’t think any of them are the next Roger Ebert, but they don’t mince words, and that is very helpful.
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)
There’s that old theory that used to go around the internet every few months that the entire day is just a figment of Cameron’s imagination, that he dreamed the whole thing. Playing hooky with your inappropriately close best friend and his very cool, very attractive girlfriend isn’t Cameron’s dream, it’s my dream.
Star Trek (2009)
All those lens flares were actually edited in because after an early screening of the film, the entire audience left bisexual. It was too powerful, like staring into the sun.