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Don't Be "Swiped Over"
Dating apps are an excellent way to meet people, whether you're seeking a hook-up, a long-term relationship, or just curious what's out there. But as you may have noticed, these apps make it pretty easy to swipe without putting much thought into it. The following is a list of do's and don'ts when using hookup apps to ensure you won't be swiped over.
1. Do: Show Your Face
There is nothing worse than a torso shot, or a picture of something random, or a picture of someone else altogether. If a person rejects you because of your face, they aren't worthy of your time. Show your face, own it, be proud.
2. Don’t: Catfish
Catfishing is deceptive, unfair, and surprisingly common. Any conversation based on false pretense will probably not end well, and it's foolish to think otherwise. No one likes to be led on, so be upfront and honest with people.
3. Do: Use Recent Photos
Maybe your body isn't as "hot" as you think it used to be. Posting ancient pics is nothing more than a bait and switch. On a hook up app, you want the person to be interested in YOU, in the present day. Use recent photos, because posting old photos is no better than catfishing.
4. Don’t: Upload Any Nudes
It's crazy that we have to tell people this in 2017: be careful about put on the internet. A recent Jack’d glitch temporarily unlocked everyone's private pictures for several hours. To prevent this from happening to you, it’s best to not share nudes on the app. If and when you're ready to send nudes, exchange phone numbers and do so there!
5. Do: Meet Up In Public
It is always best to meet in public, especially if you aren’t familiar with the area or the person you're meeting up with. Be cautious of people who insist on meeting up in private, and always make sure to text a friend or roommate the address of your meetup location before heading out.
6. Don’t: Meet in Unknown Locations
Once you pick a place to meet up, make sure to scope it out beforehand. Let the person know if you aren't comfortable with the area, suggest somewhere you are familiar with, and again, text the address to a friend so they know where you are.
7. Do: Write a Profile
Don't miss the opportunity to share a little about yourself on your profile. It doesn't need to be more than a sentence or two, and is definitely worth the effort. Be humorous or sincere, talk about your hobbies or what music you like, and try your best to give others a feel for who you are. Let your personality shine through your words.
8. Don’t: Write a Book
Your profile should be thought of like an elevator speech. In 30 to 60 seconds, give the best impression of yourself you can. Profiles that are too long may not get read (sorry!), and after all, don't you want to save some of the details for the in person meet-up?
9. Do: Be Transparent
Be clear about what you're looking for. Whether you're pursuing a long-term relationship, a hook-up, a friendship, or all of the above, it is okay to be honest about it. Be clear in your intentions, needs, and boundaries to ensure you're starting new relationships in an open and honest place.
10. Don’t: Discriminate
Far too often, people use very discriminatory language on their dating profiles and disguise it as “preference”. Although qualities like "drug-free," "disease-free," "no fat," "no femme" may represent your ideal partner or hookup, it doesn’t lessen the impact those words can have on others. If someone hits you up and you aren’t interested, just don’t respond. And it definitely doesn't hurt to spend some time thinking about why you have these dating "preferences" in the first place.
11. Do: Ask About Status
Sexual health and responsibility is about having a conversation. Give a person the right to decide if they want to pursue sex after you have an honest discussion about risk factors, STIs, and sexual health. We owe it to ourselves and each other to keep sex safe.
12. Don’t: Assume Anything
Ask questions! And when you are done asking questions, ask one more. If something doesn’t feel right ask, about it. Assumptions about things can be seriously dangerous. If it seems like a catfish, question it. If someone isn’t being upfront, question it. When it coming to hooking up, there really is no such thing as a dumb question.
