Clairo finally feels like herself. Following her debut at Coachella earlier this month, the 20-year-old "Throwaway" singer is ready to share her truth with the world.
"I'm still not really sure what my sexuality is, but I do know that it's not straight," she told Out. "I'm having my gay sob right now, where I'm just letting all my emotions out and finally crying from that experience when I was twelve years old, 'Why are girls so hot?'"
Clairo was pushed into the spotlight at seventeen when "Pretty Girl," a tongue-in-cheek commentary on the expectations of women that she recorded in her bedroom, went viral. After a few years of getting to know herself, she's ready to put her feelings for girls into her music.
"A lot of my new songs are directed towards women, are obviously about women," Clairo told PRIDE hours before her Coachella weekend two set. "There are a couple songs that I made that are about women that are extremely upbeat, and I wanted that. They're a little corny and they're just happy songs."
"I think the main thing I wanted to come across with those songs is that, they're about women, they're for women, or for the gay experience, and instead of it being this emotional sad thing that you're talking about, that you're going through... Of course, it's a difficult thing to go through. Of course, it's so hard to come to that realization, but I also think that it's something that should be celebrated, that is a happy time. I don't hear enough happy, dance-y songs that are meant for girls who like girls."
Clairo's ready to change that.
"I just wanted a couple songs that were undeniably pop, fun, dance songs that listeners can know that that song was meant for them. Not just changing the pronouns so that it works for them."
Courtesy of Coachella
That begs the obvious question: are any of her current songs actually about girls?
"I don't think there are any songs where I've really written about girls," she pauses. "I think "Flaming Hot Cheetos" is a little bit...
"A lot of my music, you can tell it's about a guy, but I've also kept some songs very in the middle, you can't tell who I'm talking about because I'm not using any pronouns. I think I enjoy listening to songs that are like that, because then anyone can really connect to it."
"But yeah, "Flaming Hot Cheetos" is like kind of the first song where I was dipping my toe into that. But I never really told anyone. Then everyone made their own opinions on it. I've really focused on it in my new music."
But what about "Heaven?" Clairo recorded the single for the Skate Kitchen soundtrack and there's some undeniable sexual tension between her and pink shirt girl, as fans were quick to point out in the YouTube comments. "*screams in lesbian*," wrote one commenter. "there are too many clairo/pink shirt girl interactions for this movie to not be GAY," said another.
Clairo laughs, "That video does have a lot of gay energy. It wasn't on purpose, but now that I watch it... The whole vibe of the video is very gay and I kind of love it, but I don't think that was the intention. But I'm so glad it turned out that way."
They'll be no confusion which songs are about women, especially since Clairo is heavily involved in the production. But while that's obvious to fans who watched teenage Clairo create songs in her bedroom, her experience is often overlooked.
Another viral sensation, folk-pop singer-songwriter Maggie Rogers expressed her frustration to the New York Times when people ascribe her song "Alaska" as "that song Pharrell made for you," and how she feels underestimated as a woman in an industry where her success is often attributed to men.
Clairo can relate.
"I don't think that people will immediately understand how much I did produce. I feel like that's just kind of part of the industry. There are some stereotypes. I think that people think that women just aren't as involved in the production side as men are. That's just kind of a weird bar that's been set. But I've met so many female musicians that produce all of their own stuff, or they have a heavy hand on everything. They're just doing it all. I feel like that attitude is slowly shifting, people are realizing that women are incredible and do everything."
Clairo's new album Immunity is out now.
