As a collective group, there are certain things that I wish the media -- or her family -- could tell Lindsay Lohan over tea and crumpets. Affirmations, if you will. First, we’d have to get her to agree that it would be okay to leave behind the Adderall, Ambien, Vodka and who knows what else for tea and crumpets and then, secondly, she'd have to agree to listen and take it in before judging and arm flailing. Assuming that we are now collectively sitting roundtable -- like enjoying proper, civilized tea, I offer the following discussion points to help Lindsay get back on her feet again and be a happy, healthy human being.
1. It is time to be responsible for action and inaction.
This means that regardless of people who have harmed you in the past (i.e. Michael “ex-dad” Lohan, Samantha Ronson, paparazzi, friends, acquaintances, co-workers, etc.), you must take responsibility for your role in the game - even if your role was being the victim at that point in time. Sure, you couldn’t choose your parents or any of the actions they participated in before you arrived, but you still have control over how their lives have affected you and how you choose to move forward. You have the choice. Destiny is not “handed” to any of us. Now, if you participated in any sort of activity that could be deemed inappropriate or hurtful to others, you must also take responsibility for those actions. Whether or not you think you did wrong, if your actions hurt others, you must own it.
2. Respect is something that is earned.
Respect is not just the name of a song. Throwing things at exes, getting drunk in public and falling head over heels into bushes do not allow people the chance to become endeared to you. Sadly, it promotes the opposite. You must first respect yourself before others are able to respect you. Go out! Have fun! Live it up! Just be respectful while you’re doing so. Respect might be easy to attain, but it’s harder to get back once it’s lost.
3. You fans love you and that's why we’re disappointed.
No one wants to see you go to jail and rehab. You are a wonderful human being underneath all of the make-up, clothing and such. We just want to see you get help because we do not want a repeat of last year’s Michael Jackson tragedy. We believe in you. We want you to do well. Think about it…if we didn’t want you to do well, we wouldn’t be writing every few days asking when the people around you in your close circle are going to get you some help. Tough love, babe.
4. It is good to have time alone.
Being single is a great way to learn about yourself, your likes and dislikes, as well as what makes you tick. You’re young (for now) and should take a little time to be alone and figure out what you want out of your life. No one else can tell you better than you can tell yourself. If you hop from one relationship to the next for the rest of your life, you’ll end up in a circle of miserable attempts at finding yourself because you cannot find yourself through another person’s eyes.
5. Stop hiding behind your age when you get into trouble.
Again, back to the responsibility thing. No one cares if you are in your early 20’s and “don’t know better”. When you were 18 years old the excuse was that you were a teenager and didn’t know better. Looking ahead, are we to believe you every time you say you were “40, 50 and 60 years old” and didn’t know better? Yes, you do know better and everyone, including you, knows it. It is scary to own your actions, but you’ll be better off for it. The charade is worn-out and it’s time to throw the ole’ mask away.
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6. Partying every night of the week is not healthy.
Regardless of whether or not you are actually drinking and doing drugs, partying every night of the week at this club and that one is not healthy for anyone. Go back and read number four on this list again. Is it the fear of being alone that sends you running out to West Hollywood at 3am? Wouldn’t you have more fun sitting at home on Twitter? All joking aside, it cannot be healthy for anyone to be out every single night until the wee hours of the morning. When the person doing the running around out to clubs is enrolled in a substance abuse course she is failing to complete….not such a good idea. Ding, ding, ding…I hear alarms. Why don’t you?
7. Make the move out of the City of Angels before you become one.
You will not lose work forever and, in fact, you may even gain some job offers if you remove yourself from the City of Angels. The world has way too many Hollywood angels already without adding your name to the Pearly Gate’s Welcome List. Why not move out to Utah and play with all of the pretty horses you enjoyed back in rehab some time ago? Seriously, if you cannot remove the bad influences away from you, you must learn how to remove yourself. Try it. You can always go back.
8. You will draw to you all the positives in the world when you become positive.
Again, throwing things at people’s heads and writing “F you” on your fingernails is probably not the best way to draw the positive things to you that you want in your life. Instead, channel the good energy your way by going out and doing more for the community (without a court order, preferably). You’ll soon notice that when you do good for others, others will do good for you right back.
9. Be careful who you trust.
Trust, like respect, is not something that you should take lightly. Only give your trust (and your body) to those who are close to you, know you and still love you. Wait, that didn’t sound right. Basically, to be constructive, just be careful with your trust because it is a prized possession and not something that should be sold to the highest bidder in a contest of loyalty. Loyalty is something that can be tested over time, such as trust. See the circle? Build it in your life and watch the flowers grow.
10. Karma’s a Bitch.
Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you (or something like that). Be open, vulnerable and allow all of the good karma to flow throughout your life. Negativity, fighting, name-calling, obsession, evil-doing and such are strikes against the “good” energy that will return to you in the future. It’s like a bank account. Put in and you’ll get back. Take, take, take and you’ll be bankrupt.
Your fans love you Linds, we and wish you the very best of luck. Own it. It is your destiny after all.
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