Pride month may have ended, but we here at PRIDE believe that feeling proud, confident and validated is an all year-round, 24/7 kind of thing. We tend to think that we should all take pride in ourselves and our identities at all times.
Which is why I have created a list for all of my fellow bisexuals out there; a list that details little ways we can own our bisexuality daily (and maybe help combat some biphobia in the process). It also emphasizes the importance of being proud all day, every day. Always.
1. Don't be afraid to stand up and correct, if necessary.
One thing that is a painfully common annoyance to bisexuals is when people make assumptions about us. We are surrounded by assumptions and stereotypes on a daily basis. We are assumed to be straight or gay because we live in a world that has trouble understanding things that live more toward the center of the spectrum. It is assumed that we're going to eventually "pick a side," and live out the rest of our days happily as full straight or full gay. Because we enjoy sex and/or relationships with people of different sexes and/or genders, it's assumed that we're ready to get down with just about anybody at any time.
This is why using our own voices to combat these assumptions is so important. Don't be afraid to assert yourself and challenge what people assume to be a reality.
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2. Merch.
Then again, sometimes you can let your appearance speak for you. There are hundreds of options for bisexual-themed clothing, jewelry, and accessories out there. Just search "bisexual" on Amazon, Human, or Etsy and you'll find loads of options.
Of course, I'm partial to the "It ain't no lie, baby I'm bi bi bi" shirt from Human. I've mentioned it in a dozen articles, I wear it on a weekly basis and I refuse to stop. What can I say? It's hilarious and validating as hell.
3. Surround yourself with validating friends
After coming out five years ago, it became very clear to me very quickly that inundating yourself with positive, validating energy is a key to living your life as a proud bisexual. Of course, for some, between disapproving family members and disinterested coworkers, this can be tricky. That's why friends are the key here.
Friends are the family you choose for yourself. Make sure to choose ones who make you feel safe and heard. Choose friends who understand that bisexuality is a real thing. Choose friends who would go to battle for you over that fact. Choose friends who use inclusive language and ask things like "Who are they?" and "What's their name?" when you say you're going on a date.
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4. Share your story (or stories)
We live in a world where sharing information about yourself is easier than ever. You can check-in at brunch, Instagram your pretty cocktails, and rant on Twitter about the bad service. But we can also use social media for more impactful things.
We can use our voices to share our tales. Bisexual voices are important, especially in a world that still denies our existence. Our experiences matter, and one key way to get others to see that is to simply share those experiences. Of course, you don't have to do so. It's perfectly fine if sharing information about your life on the Internet isn't your jam. But, if it is, please take to Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, or wherever and say what you have to say.
5. Go to LGBT spaces and own it
This experience is one that -- pardon the pun -- could go either way. Bisexuals know that oftentimes LGBT spaces don't always feel as homey as they should, despite "B" being in the acronym and all. We can be made to feel that we aren't queer enough, and most of us have stories of being wrongly referred to as "the straight one."
But, you know what? Those are our spaces, too. So let's go. Let's have a great time, remind others that bisexuals are part of the community too, and let's wear our "bi bi bi" shirts as we do it. (Seriously, any excuse to wear that shirt; I am in)
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6. Join the conversation on social media
Another huge service social media provides is the opportunity to connect with other bisexuals around the world. There are Twitter and Facebook accounts that simply compile articles relating to bisexuality. There are accounts for bi resource centers. There are activist accounts. There's something for every bi person. Follow one, follow them all. Just get connected.
Though I'd recommend following a bunch. My Twitter feed is basically a bisexual information smorgasbord. It's amazing.
7. Get yourself a flag
First of all, make sure you know we have a pride flag. Then buy one.
For four years now I have had a bi pride flag somewhere in my home. It might sound bizarre, but there's something about waking up every day and seeing that flag that helped me become more and more confident, assertive, and proud of my bisexuality. It's a symbol that reminds me of all of the badass bisexuals that came before me, and how cool it is that I get to be part of that club.
Because we are a pretty awesome club, aren't we?
